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Sir, step away from the fertilizer NOW! Astounding do-it-yourself lawn care results!

Sure, anybody can take care of the lawn right? Well, some of your neighbours have chosen to roll up their sleeves, and tackle lawn care head-on by themselves. The results have to be seen to be believed! How many of the following techniques have you seen in your neighbourhood?

Results of non selective weed control
All too common DIY mistake: Round up should never be used for selective weed control on turf unless you want to kill it

Improvised weed management: This homeowner has shrewdly used a non-selective herbicide like Round-up or horticultural vinegar, to kill those pesky weeds on his boulevard! As you can see, no weed (or grass plant) can stand up to them.

Keep it on the down-low though. Using these products like this is illegal. (and only meant for hard surfaces…)
It’s a good thing nobody can tell he’s applied them to his lawn.
Lawn striping from hand-spreading fertilizer

Fertilizing by hand, you can even see locations where they reached into the bag & the arc of the curve thorw

The personal touch: This homeowner has taken hands-on literally. By artistically throwing handfuls of fertilizer onto his lawn, rather than spreading them evenly, he has created a unique work of art. No one else on the block will have a lawn that stands out like this one!
The only downside is he may attract crop-circle enthusiasts. A small price to pay!
Grass striping on a lawn from drop fertilization

BAD: drop spreader, fertilizer & poor spatial awareness- GOOD: proves how well fertilizer can work

Artistic and utilitarian: The striped lawn is achieved by fertilizing with a drop-spreader, and being careful to make sure each of your passes does not match up with the one before it.
Striped lawns make great meditative labyrinths, or for playing very small games of football.
Mechanical damage on a stressed lawn

High Temperatures + Drough stressed lawns + heavy lawn mower = mechanical tire damage on turf

The lived-in lawn: This is a more advanced technique. First, the do-it-yourselfer needs to stress the lawn. This can be done with any combination of lack of fertilization, watering badly,  mowing the lawn too short, not paying attention to the hot dry weather, or not understanding thre stresses that affect plants.
Once that is accomplished, make sure to run your lawn mower over the exact same path every time, with an over-sized lawn mower with  upgraded jumbo tires and watch the browned wheel-ruts appear as if by magic!
Damage from fertilizer burn

Customer admitted they did it themselves: fertilizer applied by hand- nice and green at the right amount- burnt in others

More is better: Anything worth doing is worth overdoing. Here the homeowner has very heavily put down fertilizer. Sure, the excess nitrogen has burned the lawn to death here and there, but look how great the grass that survived looks!
As an added touch, the neglected pieces of sod placed sloppily to patch holes give the lawn a bit more flair, like dusty burlap throw cushions.
So look around your own neighbourhood. You will probably find a do-it-yourself lawn artist who will advise you against hiring a professional.
He may even offer to make your lawn as eye-catching as his own!
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